Sunday, February 03, 2008
Be my valentine...Husbands and Romance...Part II
1) Read Song of Songs, Esther, the book of Ruth, and other passages in the Bible that inspire you to be loving and romantic toward your husband.
2) Understand and express appreciation for your husband's romantic "language". For example, your husband may think he's being romantic when he keeps your car running safely, for your protection. Another example is this: Last summer, my husband heard me say, "I miss having a cat in our house", and he hunted for just the kitten he thought would delight me. That was every bit as romantic as when he brings me flowers.
3) Speak your husband's romantic language. My husband can take or leave romantic candles on the table or in the bedroom. If we light them, it's more for me. My husband finds it romantic when I anticipate and meet his needs for domestic order. He really is the man for whom Flylady's admonition was spoken: "Nothing says love like providing your family with clean underwear." He also finds it romantic when we go new places together. My husband goes out of his way to speak my romantic language, so I want to do the same for him.
4) Have occasional conversations, in which you discuss what each of you finds to be romantic. Don't try to have a serious talk about this every time he turns around. A man generally doesn't appreciate over-analyzing a relationship. He does, however, appreciate your giving him a gentle, yet straightforward, suggestion about what really does make you feel loved. He wants to learn how to speak your romantic language. He also appreciates your efforts to understand what makes him feel romantic. Understand that you and your husband will both mature through the decades, so what each of you find romantic at one stage of marriage may differ from what you find romantic later on. So, keep learning about each other through the years.
5) Appreciate your husband's noble, masculine nature, and dress and act in a way that honors your own noble, feminine nature. When it comes to romance, opposites both attract each other and complement each other. A man rises to his best for a womanly wife, and a wife rises to her best for a masculine and gentlemanly man. Of course, you are friends. You also share a household and a room. You may be parents together. You may work alongside each other in some endeavor. But, along with all of that, you are still a man and a woman who are in love with each other. If you remember that as you interact together, you'll each feel more confident, and you'll have a happy romance!