The Harvest of Grace

The Harvest of Grace by Cindy Woodsmall is an enjoyable read with interesting characters.  It's not great literature, but, then, I don't think anyone picks up a book in this genre with the hope of discovering The Great American Novel.  It's the kind of thing to read when you are curled up in bed with a cold, and you want to enjoy something sweet, predictable, and soothing.  I have many such moments in my life, and, apparently, a lot of other women do, too, for there are shelves upon shelves of Amish literature.     

I have read a few novels in this particular genre that I really have enjoyed.  I wonder, though, if the Amish are amazed that fictional tales of their lifestyle fill so many bookshelves. I also wonder if they are surprised to see their doctrine mixed with the doctrine of modern evangelicalism.  It seems ironic, given their desire for simplicity, that they have received so much publicity in this form.  I also hope that neither writers nor readers believe that Amish novels are the limit of Christian fiction. 

Perhaps, one reason why we are drawn to reading and writing Amish fiction today is that the Amish culture presents a way to develop modern characters who are wholesome.  I think women today are craving more wholesome subjects for reading.  Is that why Jane Austen has been so popular in the last few decades? I wonder.  Despite her satirical themes, her characters can be counted on to behave themselves tolerably well in your drawing room. There is a place for wholesome characters who live wholesome lives and who overcome their struggles by their faith. 

By the way, I received a review copy of this book from the publisher, but my opinions are my own.
 

14 days to a sneeze free home: Pollen, cleaning, and allergies

Have you been sneezing your way through spring?  Have you awakened each morning to thick, yellow blankets of pollen?  For some, spring is allergy season, just as fall's ragweed period is the time others sniffle.

Because the winter of 2011/2012 was so mild, spring of 2012 has already
seen early high pollen counts. Here in Nashville, we've had blooming trees and green grass for many weeks now.

Here's what's happening with pollen in the Nashville area today

Tree pollen count for 03/29/12:

Very High

Most active tree pollen types:

• Cedar
• Maple
• Pine

I can feel the high counts in stuffy sinuses and achy joints.

According to an article on Pollen.com:

An allergy is a heightened sensitivity to a foreign substance (called an allergen) that causes the body's defense system (the immune system) to overreact when defending itself.
Normally, the immune system would only react if a harmful substance, such as bacteria, attacks the body. For people with allergies, their immune system is working too hard, and it reacts even when relatively harmless substances, such as pollen, are present. The severity of an allergic reaction can vary from mild discomfort to life threatening situations.
Allergens can stimulate an immune response when you breathe in or touch the allergen, or by ingestion of food or beverage, or from injections of medication.
Common allergic reactions include eczema, hives, hay fever, asthma, food allergies, pet dander allergies, and reactions to the venom of stinging insects, such as wasps and bees.

 One of the best ways to deal with pollen is to give your house and other surroundings, such as a car or office, extra cleaning attention. Unfortunately, if you are suffering an allergic reaction, this may be the time when you least feel like exerting yourself to clean.  However, if you can push through without further endangering your health, it's worth the effort.   

 

Remember, it's not always the pollen that you can visibly see that causes allergies, though it can be. However, we want to clean away visible pollen, as it can build up in unsightly layers and attract dust and smaller pollens that could be your true allergy triggers.  In the process of cleaning, we hope that we will clean away even the tiniest of particles. 

So, despite the fact that my next 15 days are packed to the gills with activities, I'm embarking on a plan to create a more allergen free environment.  If you'd like to follow along, just take the steps each day that I do.  Otherwise, create your own cleaning plan.

 

Here are my goals for Day I:

 

1)  Brush the dog thoroughly.  House pets who go outside for short breaks or in- and- outdoor pets track in allergens.  

2)  Brush hair or wash it thoroughly.   Human hair attracts dust and pollen and allergens, just as pet hair can.  A good idea when cleaning is to cover your hair with a cloth or scarf to prevent it from collecting dust.  It's also wise to keep hair clean and neatly brushed.  Too much brushing can be harmful to the hair, so don't overdo.  Just clean it out.

3) Wash brushes and combs.

4)  15 minutes de-junking.  Junk, clutter, even valuable objects that you don't want or use anymore all collect dust, pollen, and allergens.

5)  Wipe windshield of car and mirrors to make sure that they are free of pollen buildup.  Pollen buildup on the glass surfaces of your car can interfere with your driving vision.

 

Bonus:  Dry wipe the walls and ceilings of your bedroom, along with any ceiling fans.  You can even use a long swiffer pole and a swiffer dust cloth for this.   

 

Any other cleaning you have already accomplished or planned for the day.    

Enjoy!

The Hunger Games?

Are my husband and I the only ones struggling with the teen-on-teen violence in the Hunger Games books and movie?  To be honest, I've not seen the movie nor read the books.  I've merely seen the movie trailer and have also talked with some preteens/young teens who are interested in the Hunger Games.  I hear that it does have a positive ending in which the main character comes to decry violence of any kind.

However, my understanding is that, along the way,  teens are placed in a situation where they must be killed or be killed.    Is that wise mental food to be serving teens given the fact that we've seen some horrendous acts of school violence by troubled children/teens/young adults in the past few decades, as well as seeing teen lives taken by gang violence?  On the other hand, am I a hypocrite to be bothered by this, as I have watched movies in which adults are killed?  Saving Private Ryan, for example, showed war in all its ugliness, but I did view it. 

Where does all of this fit with Phil. 4:4-8's admonition to guard the things we think about?I think we are naive if we don't understand that the things we choose to read and watch do affect us on some level.     

What about you?  Have you read the books or seen the movie?  If you have, what did you think?  If you have, are you eager to or reluctant to see what it's all about?  Will you let your preteens and teens see or read this series?

I wasn't interested in the Twilight series, either.  I heard an interesting point on a radio show.  The original Dracula by Bram Stoker was clearly portrayed as evil and unappealing, while the vampire characters in Twilight are portrayed as being tragically romantic -- and tragic romance is irresistible to many a young girl.  Having neither read the original Dracula or the Twilight books, I can't speak to that with certainty.  But, I did find that thought to be interesting.

What say you?  I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Enjoy!

Father of the Bride House

Have you read the February/March issue of HGTV Magazine?  A friend was kind enough to send an issue over for me to peruse while I had a bought with a cold.  I was delighted to read an article about a young couple who live in the house in which the Father of the Bride and its sequel were filmed.  I'm a sucker for white siding and climbing roses, as well as for the two movies (and the originals with Spencer Tracy and Elizabeth Taylor). 

The house is located in Pasadena, CA.   They told their realtor that they were looking for a house like the one in the movie and were surprised to find that they were able to buy the actual one.   Read the article to learn about the upsides and downsides to living in such a famous dwelling.

Enjoy!

Brown and peach....

As I mentioned in an earlier post, I recently had our bathroom tiled.  With the tile I chose, I envisioned going toward an old world scheme or possibly blue/tan, as I am crazy about blue right now.  I ended up with peach and brown, though.   I chose a spiced beige paint which ended up looking like blush peach, and I just sort of rolled with things from there.  I'm pretty happy with the results, as it is a warm and inviting space, and it's masculine enough for my husband and feminine enough for me.  With just a little tweaking in the bedroom, I can extend the theme throughout by using blue/peach/cream or very light brown touches.  I'll show photos soon.

Today, I looked up decorating in peach and brown and found these articles and images:

Peach and brown bathroom    

Brown and peach gallery

Here are two rooms from the gallery above that blend brown or cream and peach well: 

How about you. What color schemes do you favor?

Enjoy!

Are you sentimentally attached to clutter?

I need a 12 step program for people who are sentimentally attached to clutter.  That's one of my biggest bugaboos in my quest for a streamlined home.  Yet, I am determined to overcome this mindset.

I closed out my father's house last year after he moved into assisted living.  So, I have stuff that he kept from WWII, from my grandfather's cattle farm, from my late aunt, and from my late mother, as well as things that people have given to me or that remind me of my children's childhood or that dear hubby and I acquired at some meaningful occasion. 

Since girlhood, I have been a sentimental clutterer.  I kept a bulletin board in my room on which I pinned movie tickets from dates or outings with friends, corsages that dried nearly to dust, and, once, the string of a hot air balloon  which I kept until it had almost no more air left in it.  Those things are long gone, but I have the new equivalent.

Of course, some sentimental treasures are worth keeping.  I still have my husband's letters from when we were engaged, and he went to another city to begin his work, while I waited behind until we married.   I also have cards and letters he has given me through the years.  Those are staying put.  I also do have some antiques that I will keep.

Sentimentality toward clutter can come in a number of ways:

1)  Sometimes, people hold on to objects that even have negative responses associated with them. 
2)  Sometimes, people hang on to objects out of guilt.  For example, if someone gives you something, you may feel obligated to keep it.  Perhaps, you never wanted it in the first place.  Perhaps, you once did, but it no longer fits your home.
3)  Sometimes, people hold onto objects because they associate them with happy times and people whom they love. 

None of the above is necessarily right or wrong.  However, if clutter like this does get in the way of your lifestyle or becomes a burden, it's time to whittle it down.  For the sentimental person, deciding what to keep and what to throw can create a little anxiety.  It's best to remember that, in the end, it's only stuff, and it is not equivalent to people, memories, or our personal identity.

(Don't forget to leave a comment on http://tennesseemoment.blogspot.com by April 10th to be entered in a drawing to receive a copy of my historical novel, "A Tree Firmly Planted".   


Enjoy!

Mmm Mmm good and oh so simple...

This little bite that I just had for lunch is so simple that it doesn't belong in my recipe section.  But, it's tasty!

I simply take a large tomato basil tortilla (yummy), sprinkle it with shredded cheese, fold it in half, and either toast it in the oven or zap it for a few seconds in the microwave, just long enough for the cheese to melt.  The oven is better; the microwave is quicker.  Of course, there are any number of things you could add to tweak this:  olives, sour cream, pizza sauce, meat, etc.  But, it's the tomato basil wrap that's the key.

Enjoy!

Bathroom redo, part deux...

Taking all suggestions for the following:

We have double sinks in a white counter, which I really like. There is one large mirror across the counter and a strip of Hollywood lights across the top. Those Hollywood lights were out of style even when the house was built, so I'm not sure why those were used. I'm sure that they are inexpensive. I'd like to take down the Hollywood strip and find something else.

So, to reiterate, I will have a cameo floor tile with spiced beige paint. I'm traditional/old world/romantic in taste, but also want to consider my husband's masculine sensibilities.

I'd love your ideas!

It's softly raining and a little dark -- prime napping weather!! I'd love right now to be snoozing like this little kitten princess, but have much to do.

I've just completed the hair raising process (for me) of selecting floor tile and pain for Doc Brilliant's and my master bathroom. We tend to stick with choices for a long time, so re-doing in a short time if I don't like it is not an option.

When in doubt, go neutral. Sounds easy, right? But, if you're like me, that opens up a whole new set of questions: cool neutrals? warm neutrals? What if I like these neutrals for Doc Brilliant's and my master bathroom, but really would rather use slightly different neutrals in another part of the house? And, how does all this fit with existing fixtures?

I ended up with a tile called cameo which has speckles of various neutrals in it, but overall is sort of a camel. I decided on spiced beige paint for the walls. I'll post a photo when my bathroom redo is done.

I think one way I can ensure continuity is to use the same white trim throughout the house.

Doc Brilliant likes warm tones, so I hope that this bathroom will feel warm and cozy for him. There's enough of my froufrou in all the other rooms to lighten my heart.

Of course, color is not the only consideration. There is the material and texture of the tile, as well as the value and the cost to think about.

And, the thing is, that no matter what colors you use, nothing looks good until your house is sparkling. So, off to do some chores in that line.

While I'm cleaning, you all are welcome to leave any tips for me on choosing such things as tile, paint, etc. What have your experiences been? What are your favorite products? What have been your experiences with different kinds of floor tile?

The Proverbs 31 woman has been held up as an example by both sides of "The Mommy Wars". When I was a child, she was considered to be the supreme example of the woman who makes home and family her career. After all, her activities are centered in her household, and her home is the base of her operation. People saw her as a wife and mother who happened to bring in extra money.

In the eighties, many began to point out that the worthy woman is a businesswoman. She evaluates and buys a field. She plants a vineyard out of her own earnings. She makes and sells linen garments. She makes and sells sashes. Many saw her as a professional who happened to have a husband and a family.

So, which is she, the hard working stay-at-home wife and mother or the equally hard working wife who holds down a full-time outside job?

I don't claim that I have the definitive answer, but here are some thoughts. The description of the worthy woman is timeless. However, as to detail, it was obviously given to us before the Industrial Revolution. For the better part of our world's history, most people lived in an agrarian economy. While men may have led, most husbands and wives worked closely together in or near the home. Most people were farmers or herders. Some operated small businesses, many of which were located in or very near the home. Some were religious or political leaders.

Some men were in the military. Some were merchants who did travel long distances to purchase goods and to sell them along trade routes. These were two of the few enterprises that might take a man away from his home for long periods of time.

Neither men nor women were likely to leave the home in the morning, work a full day, and come home in the evening. Until the Industrial Revolution, this was not a common pattern. Even in the early days of the U.S., peoples' lives were generally centered close to home, with exceptions being a man who was a soldier, sailor, or circuit minister.

We still see vestiges of home centered life and business today. We've all known couples who operated small businesses together or families in which one member was a professional and another ran the professional's business side. Likewise, if you are familiar with life on a family farm, you know that is a whole-family enterprise.

Two of my cousins' wives live in the same small town, and they bought and planted a small field of bell peppers, most of which they sold. This was not their main work, and it did not take them away from their homes. It did provide supplemental income and some personal satisfaction for the two.

I often think of these women when I read that the Proverbs 31 woman considered a field, bought it, and planted a vineyard. I also think about the fact that grapes provided needed liquid and calories, as well as wine to drink and wine for medicine. This was important in a Mediterranean or Middle Eastern semi-arid culture in the days before refrigeration. The worthy woman could make great use of her grapes in her own household, as well as sell grapes or wine for added income.

The worthy woman also sewed. Sewing, too, would have been an essential skill for any woman of the day. There were no fashion runways, department stores, box stores, boutiques, malls, mail order clothes, fabric mills, or clothing manufacturers. What fabric there was had to be hand-loomed of homespun and hand dyed fibers. If you count the time it takes to grow flax or for sheep to produce wool enough to shave, plus the time to spin thread and turn it into fabric and then to hand-sew it, you can see that the production of even one garment might take a year or more. Thus, it behooved the manager of a large household to know how to perform these steps. If she could also sell her handiwork to merchants, who could then sell it to others, she could again make some supplemental income.

The work of a skilled seamstress must have been highly valued in her world. Again, while this work might require her to be out and about a bit, it did not take her away from her family for very long at a time. Much of it could be done in the home or on the family land, where she would be available to her husband and to her children.

Though we do see some examples of this lifestyle in our culture today, the Industrial Revolution brought about more of an urban, corporate, industrialized society. As the society transformed from being largely agrarian to largely based on manufacture and commerce, the daily life of the family changed as well. There developed a pattern of leaving the home sphere for a long day of work in a factory or a business and coming back home only when that work was over. Home became more of a place to eat, sleep, and recover from work, rather than the base of the family's occupation and lifestyle.

In the early days of the manufacturing age, men, women, and children were employed in mills, mining, and factories, and the entire family might go off in different directions for work each early morning. More people moved from farms or small towns to large cities to find employment in factories or corporations, a process that started in the 1700's, but became more rapid in the first half of the 20th century. Child labor laws eventually corrected the abuse of pushing children into crowded factories to work, at least in 1st world economies. However, the prevailing pattern of work became one in an individual leaves the home in the morning, goes off to a workplace, and comes home only at night.

With the exception of WWII, the pattern in the first six decades of the 20th century was that the man would go off to a job in the morning, while the woman stayed at home to manage the household and to care for children. In the late 70's and eighties, women entered this modern workplace, as well. Thus, the process of rearing children was largely shifted to school and daycare, with children being at home with families only in the evenings and on weekends.

Today's Information Revolution may be slightly reversing the trend of going out of the home to a corporate or manufacturing job. Now, many are able to work from home via computers and the Internet. Many new ways have opened up for women (and for men) to market their skills from home. Some are able to carve new niches in this information based economy and to find work they truly enjoy doing using their home as a base. Moreover, today's corporate workplace is more flexible than it was in the 19th and 20th centuries, allowing people to move in and out of corporate careers.

Likewise, some, for various reasons, some families consciously choose to reinvent the pre-industrial home or farm centered business lifestyle. In the 1960's, people often did this as a reaction to materialism, for they felt that the society which had its roots in the Industrial Revolution had become a materialistic one. Many also felt that modern society also separated people from nature and had also damaged the ecology. Others in recent decades have chosen this lifestyle because they do feel it is best for the family.

For my part, I do aim to life a home centered lifestyle and to earn supplemental income using my home as my base. My husband and I have chosen to live in smaller homes and to drive our cars for many years and to make other little sacrifices in order for me to be a manager of our home and to care for our children. I have also been available to help care for members of our extended family who were ill. At times, I have taken on part-time work or freelance work, though. My husband has also based his career decisions based on what is best to God's kingdom and for our family, even though that meant he made some personal career sacrifices.

There is nothing inherently wrong or right about any of the aforementioned societies: agrarian, industrial, or information based. There have been pluses and minuses connected with each of these ways of life. God's word transcends all temporary circumstances and cultures. It gives us the supreme wisdom by which to live our lives no matter what our culture dictates the ideal should be. Likewise, human needs transcend all cultures. No matter what our particular cultural condition might be, there is always need in a family for a wife and mother who looks well to the ways of her household. What that might look like may vary some from era to era, but the underlying need does not.

All of that brings us back to our question. Is the worthy woman of Proverbs 31 one who takes a full time job outside the home and leaves her children to childcare outside the home? I personally don't see her as a person whose main occupation takes her away from her household for long, long hours in a day.

So, does she fit our stereotypical image of the 50's suburban housewife? Is she June Cleaver or Betty Crocker? Not really. Her life is more richly layered than our (perhaps, mistaken) impressions of that era's woman.

Can a woman imitate the Proverbs 31 woman's attention to her marriage and family and also have a full time career outside of the home? I don't think that I could, and I've known many women who floundered trying to "do it all". However, I have known some outstanding women who have managed wonderful, godly homes and have also managed wonderful full time careers at the same time. It would be a mistake to turn Proverbs 31, especially by itself and not in context of the whole Bible, into a rule about whether or not all women should or should not have full time occupations outside of their household.

Who is the worthy woman, then? In my view, she is a woman with great reverence for the Lord. Indeed, we are told that her reverence for the Lord and her fruitful life are more important than how she looks. Her spiritual clothing is strength and dignity; her physical clothing is pretty and well-made, but she is not preoccupied with fashion or adornment. She has honed skills that build her family, and some of these skills are marketable, as well. She is a blessing to her husband and children, and her husband can trust, that because of her skill and effort, all is well in their household. She manages and increases her family's resources. She is wise and kind, and she instructs her children and servants wisely. She opens her heart and her arms to those outside of her family who are in need. She watches over the affairs of her household, and she is in the home enough to know what is going on there, what is needed, and what is progressing well. She neglects nothing that has to do with her family's welfare. She loves her home and her family and finds joy in her labors for them.

I think any Godly woman would love to imitate this woman's faith and to experience the fruitful outcome of a life like this woman's. I hope that we approach these verses about worthy woman for what we can learn from her and not stamp on to her what we wish her to be. I think we do best to understand the heart and principles involved in this passage and ask ourselves what it is that the is Lord trying to teach through this lovely description. I hope we avoid tagging her with our cultural baggage and that we use scripture, and not cultural norms, as the guide for our lives.

There are many scriptures, including Proverbs 31, that show us how to order our lives. The scriptures also build our faith that if we seek the Lord and his righteousness first, he will take care of us.

As the last decades of the modern and postmodern society bump against the early decades of the information age, our cultural work patterns are zigzagging. Many daughters of 60's style feminists rejected the way their mothers pursued careers and have left the corporate world or academia to come home. Now, some of their own daughters are likewise pursuing home and family as a career, while others are in corporate or professional careers or academia, like their grandmothers were. Still others are pursuing an indie business lifestyle, which allows them to work from home and to combine work and family. Rather than swinging along with cultural trends, we each need to pray, study, and form deep convictions about what pleases the Lord and builds the family.

No matter how I might put into practice what I see in the Proverbs 31 woman, I hesitate to wave her around as a symbol in some culture war. She is so much more than that!

Enjoy!

Look for my historical novel coming soon to a Kindle or a store near you! A Tree Firmly Planted
is the story of how three young woman navigate such issues as faith, slavery, prejudice, new love, marriage, and parenthood, all while living on a battlefield. While it is fiction, it is interwoven with many true incidents that happened in Maury County, Tennessee during the
Civil War. My mother's kin have lived in middle Tennessee since pioneer days, so some of the historical events are part of our family lore.

This is book one of A Tennssee Trilogy.

Enjoy!

Questions that make you say "Hmm..."

I read an interesting discussion on the BlogHer main site today about questions that people ask of acquaintances or even strangers. A blogger noted that women are often asked questions about when they are going to start a family or when they are going to have a next child. She pointed out that many women suffer from infertility or have lost children. In such cases, questions like those can be very painful.

Others commented that these questions go both ways. Women with large families are asked questions such as, "Don't you know what causes that?" or "Are you trying to be like the Duggars?"

My single friends tell me that they don't care for a boatload of questions along the lines of "Have you found that someone yet?" or "Do you see marriage in your future?"

Once, many years ago, I visited a town where I had once lived. From the window of my hostess' home, I saw an acquaintance. She looked as if she were six months along. She carried her hand protectively over her stomach much as most of us do when we are pregnant. I wondered why I hadn't heard the news through mutual friends, but I was thrilled for her nonetheless. So, I ran out to congratulate her.

I'm sure that you've already guessed why I'm telling this story. My friend was not pregnant! She was merely carrying some extra weight. I felt horrible. I felt just as horrible when the tables were turned and someone asked me the same question in the same circumstances!

I'm sure that's not the only time I have opened my mouth and inserted my foot. Don't you think that we all mean well when we ask such questions? I think we all want to connect on a heart level with the people we encounter. Since marriage and family are close to our own hearts, we naturally turn to that subject for conversational material.

Nonetheless, I have learned the hard way that it's all to easy to wound someone with an ill-considered question or an offhand comment. I love this prayer from Psalm 141:3 "Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips."

Jesus draws people in instantly. He knows just what is in a person's heart and what questions will open their minds to God. To me, his encounter with the Samaritan woman at the well is a wonderful example of this. Of course, Jesus is both sinless and has perfect love and wisdom. If I, with my limited insight, wish to ask wise questions, I need to stay prayerful! Otherwise, I tend to open my mouth and insert my foot -- which isn't a pleasant mouthful.

How about you? Have you been wounded by a thoughtless question? When you first meet someone, what do you say or ask in order to get to know them?

Enjoy!
Elizabeth

Selfless focus is one of my goals this year. I realize how complacent I've been in the past year or so. I've let physical ailments become an excuse for indulging self.

This passage from James about selfless wisdom means a lot to me:

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth.This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, twithout partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

Many years ago, a wise woman I knew taught this acronym: Jesus first, Others second, You last -- which makes for Joy. Over the years, I've noticed that women who truly practice this are the happiest!

Wishing you a fruitful, peaceful, and wise 2012!

Enjoy!

Letters to New Moms -- 2

Dear young mother...

The book of Proverbs contains the lament of a man who did not listen to instruction when he was young and who came to ruin. (Proverbs 5:12-24)

Godly counsel is gold! It's even more so if the advice or correction comes packaged with a dose of comfort and support. Even if it's not delivered in the sweetest style, however, it's still precious, nonetheless. Young wives and mothers especially need the counsel of godly older women.

Choose your advisers wisely. Ask yourself if this person's advice is in line with scripture, if it leads you to greater faith, and if it leads you down the narrow path, rather than the broad one. Consider the outcome of your adviser's faith, as well as his or her success in the area in which they offer advice. Your advisers won't be perfect, but that's ok. You can learn much from someone who humbly walks with the Lord and who humbly admits his or her mistakes. If someone's really blown it in an area, but they have learned from their mistakes, they still have something to offer.

We live in an age when we have an abundance of information at our fingertips. This has its obvious benefits, but it also has a downside. You may find yourself overloaded with information -- even good information -- to the point of paralysis. Remember that, in the end, the Bible is the only writing that serves as an infallible, unshakable foundation for life.

Consider someone's particular advice, but take the responsibility for deciding in prayer whether to implement it or not. Do not let pride or selfishness hinder you from taking needed advice; if you do not implement advice, let it be for other reasons.

Do not compare your life to that of someone you really don't know, especially in the blog-o-sphere. Learn from blogs or books but do not hold the writings of people as an inflexible standard.

Strive for depth of knowledge as well as breadth of knowledge. In our day, it's easy to acquire breadth of knowledge. Most of us receive educations undreamed of by earlier generations. We also can learn a smattering about everything just by searching the net, not to mention coming home from the library with a stack of books. It's important to grasp breadth of knowledge, though. A few precepts, carefully considered and implemented deeply in your life will serve you better than a scatter shot of ideas. In areas where you want to do your best, learn one thing deeply before racing on to the next.

Evaluate your and your husband's priorities in life. Learn what is essential and what is nice, but nonessential. Perhaps, Mother A makes all of her baby food from scratch with ingredients grown on her many acres of land. Perhaps, she writes a blog advocating that all mothers follow this pattern, and she urges her in-real-life friends to do so, too. You can learn from her heart to provide the best she can for her family's table. Yet, her activities in this area may not fit with your family's essential priorities. You do not have to live on a farm or plant a huge garden and orchard to be a godly and effective wife and mother. While processed foods are not the healthiest, it's not the end of the world if you don't make all of your own baby food from scratch. So, take the seed of good and leave the peeling, as they say. That's only one example; in many things, there isn't a right or wrong to consider, but what is best for you and your family.
What is essential is that you bring your child up in the nurture and teaching of the Lord. Strive to grow in faith and character and to build faith and character in your child. As a family, seek the kingdom of God first. Let other things fall into their rightful places in your life.

Seek advice from people who know you and who can give you sound advice based on your situation and needs.

Imitate whatever you see of Christ in others.

Be inspired by women of faith and godly influence.

Neither be too proud to take input or correction, nor so weak-willed as to be swayed off course by every wind of teaching or opinion.

Hold tightly to God's word.

Enjoy!

What's your Happy Home Style?


When it comes to making a happy home, do you love

Neutrals or whites in decorating, with only pops of color?

Or

Colors?

Music playing in the background?

Or

Quiet, plus some natural sounds, such as breezes through open windows or children playing or birds singing?

Lots of happy light?

Or

Peaceful, serene, shaded rooms?

If you love to play music while at home, do you love

something upbeat and modern

or

soft and classical?

Open floor plans?

or

Designated rooms that can be closed off?

Dainty china?

Or

Bold tableware?

Charming pretty nick-knacks?

or

clean, open surfaces?

Vintage?

or

Modern?

There are many possibilities for creating happy home surroundings! Many home choices are neither right nor wrong, but what works best for you and your family.

Enjoy!

Letters to Young Wives and Mothers...

Letter One: Should you carpe diem? Yes, if you think of this wisely."

Young mother, this letter is inspired by a blog post I read entitled, "Don't carpe diem". It was written by a young woman who is mothering young children. If I understand her correctly, she is not encouraged when older mothers smile and give advice along the lines of "seize the day, for your children will grow quickly." She feels that older women expect her to be blissful every moment of every day and, naturally, she knows that she cannot live up to this impossible ideal.

Believe it or not, young mother, I, too, was young once. I once was a mother of young children. Older women said to me and to my peers, "Seize the day. The years when your children are at home will fly more quickly than you know." This did not irritate me or make me feel inadequate. Yet, no matter how much I agreed with the concept, I understood it only in theory. I still had to live my life day by day, to journey through life to the point where this concept became reality.

Now, I understand this experientially. This time is shorter than you can possibly realize. The stakes are high. You are helping to prepare young children for life and for eternity. And, not so very long from now, there will be a day when you do miss your young babies and toddlers and even your teens! Oh, you will be so proud of the adults they have become, and you will enjoy watching them establish homes of their own. You will still love every minute you get to spend with them. You will not spend your empty nest years longing for a time that can never come again, or, at least I pray that you will not.

Even so, when you see a mother with young children, you will be surprised how easily these words will slip from your lips: "Seize the day! The years are short. I enjoyed every minute of being a mother." Some young woman, whose child is throwing a tantrum as you speak, will look at you with puzzled eyes. "You don't mean that you enjoyed minutes like this?"

I am glad to know that some of your peers find words like these to be irritating, for I shall be careful how I speak them. Still, if I could meet my younger self, this is exactly the advice I would speak. "Spend your parenting on the things that matter for life and for eternity and don't fret about the problems so much. So, your child is throwing a tantrum in the store. It's an opportunity to teach and to bond. And, one day, you really will miss even this."

I don't expect you (or my younger self) to walk around like some super-mother who has no trials to face. I remember sleepless nights and long days when every little thing seemed to go wrong. I suffered with my children through colic and skinned knees and the ups and downs of friendships and first broken hearts and learning to obey and learning how to make wise decisions. How else do you think I got these wrinkles and these gray hairs? In the living of these years, however, I learned that sezing the day meant two things: 1) to hold on to joy and 2) to invest in eternity.

Joy does not deny problems, but meets them with faith, gratitude, and love. It is possible to rejoice and sorrow at the same time, as Paul said he did. Our example, Christ, endured the cross for the joy set before Him, as Hebrews informs us. That joy was the joy of knowing that He pleased his Father and that he was pouring out his blood for our salvation. Following Jesus in any arena of life means that we take up our own crosses and follow him daily. (Luke 14). Motherhood is one tool God uses to help us die to selfishness and grow in sacrificial, Christ-like love.

On some occasions, it takes us a moment to tap into joy. The woman who wakes up with morning sickness, only to find that her older toddler is fretful from teething and the cat has thrown up on the carpet and the washer has stopped mid-cycle, may not feel like rejoicing. The trials of life, whether they are small or large, must be reckoned with. We do need to process feelings of fear, inadequacy, grief, and irritation. But, how do we process these feelings? By going to the Lord and casting our burdens on Him. The goal isn't to be blissful every moment of every day, but to trust that the trials of life are working a more Christlike character in us and in our children. Sometimes, our path to joy involves getting the help of others who have endured similar trials. If life hurts, young mother, say so. An older mother should understand.

Joy knows that life lived with respect for the Father is well lived and has meaning. What you do as a mother has great meaning, even if motherhood is made up of many daily, ordinary-seeming moments. Perhaps, this is the most important thing we older women mean when we says, "Enjoy these days." We are older warriors who appreciate the valor of our younger counterparts.

Joy also takes note of the many, many reasons to be grateful. Joy treasures up the many happy moments and the wondrous moments and the awe-filling moments.

To seize the day because the time is short can be viewed in two ways: with a sense of worry and pressure or with a sense of faith and peace. The woman who seizes the day well understands that the time is short, but she does not fret because of this. She follows Jesus' advice: "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow has enough troubles of its own." Matthew 6:33. Likewise, she heeds his admoition to place her treasure in heaven, where it cannot be destroyed by time.

God has set eternity in the hearts of man, according to Ecclesaistes. Perhaps, that is why we are not satisfied to merely exist, but yearn to spend our time on things that matter. Perhaps, that is why the passing of time brings some pangs. This is true for the mother of children, but it is also true for every person on the planet. Our days may be busy and full, and the time may either seem to fly or to drag. There are moments, however, when eternity breaks in and we ponder whether our priorities are on track or not. No matter what we set our hand to, the time flies by more quickly than we think it will.

In light of eternity, it makes some sense to evaluate how breif our earthly existence is.

"So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom." Psalm 90:12

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men." Colossians 3:23

Seize the day!

January Cleaning!

I don't know about you, but my house is worse for the wear after the holidays. January always feels like the time to me to dig in and get things in order, not that I'm a great example of always having an orderly house.

In our area (Tennessee), we do not have hard winters, but whatever wintry weather we have usually happens between January and March. I can't say for certain that we won't have some snow this year. But, we do not have the unbroken days upon weeks of snow, salted roads and dripping snow boots, as some areas of the U. S. do. Our coldest days are usually followed by mild spells that make one thing of spring.

And, what glorious, but brief springs we have! When those few weeks of mild weather arrive, sandwiched as they are between our winters and our long, long summers, it's a delight to be outside or going places rather than doing heavy cleaning. I'd rather have the intense stuff behind me. So, getting a jump on cleaning now makes sense for our area -- or, at least for me.

Spring cleanings and fall cleanings evolved in the days when houses became very dusty and grimy from winter heating methods. People did not have central air, with its circulating currents, and even the best of house keepers had to fight winter stuffiness. Periodic deep cleanings were essential in the cities, but also evolved along with the rhythms of farm life, as a greater percentage of homes were in rural areas.

Around our part of the South, women also used to keep grass cloth mats to spread upon their regular carpets during rainy spells, such as occur most frequently in the spring and the fall. This was a must in the days when gentlemen tracked the outdoors in on their boots.

In many parts of the U.S., people changed (and still change) curtains and bedding with the seasons. Other than throwing on or taking off an extra layer of bedding, this is not as necessary where I live as it might be in other parts.

Of course, we have many large areas in the U.S. where the weather is unvarying the year round. I spent my early years in Florida, where our roses bloomed best at Christmas. House keeping in semi-tropical areas, arid areas, or Mediterranean type climates is slightly different than in areas with four distinct seasons.

With the advent of central air and other conveniences, many people have dispensed with seasonal cleaning altogether and prefer to work monthly and quarterly and annual chores into their regular cleaning schedule. Others still find its valuable to designate specific periods for deep cleaning.

The need to keep our personal and family shelter clean hasn't changed over time. However, the different circumstances of our lives mean that we can tweak our cleaning habits to suit our and our family's lifestyles. This require thinking through our family's needs, rather than doing what our mothers and grandmothers did simply because they did it. On the other hand, understanding how they cleaned and why can help us adapt their wisdom about keeping a clean and orderly home to our practices today.

What about you? In what type of climate do you live? How do you handle non-routine cleaning chores? Do you set aside periods of deep cleaning? Or, do you work extra tasks into a weekly routine? What accommodations do you make in your house cleaning for the types of weather you normally have?

Enjoy!

Happy New Year!!
Here's to another trip around the sun...
Love, Joy, and Peace
Blessings and Hope
Walking with Christ
Fresh start, fresh life, fresh home
Goals and Progress
Resting and Refreshing
Work and Stillness
Goodness Abounding
Steps in the Journey
On our Way Home
God's mercies are new every morning!

Have you seen these 86 fresh Christmas decorating ideas from Southern Living Magazine? Of course, as is always the case with Southern Living, the accompanying photos are lovely.

In the photo above is an idea that I'm thinking about trying. I have some random silver pieces from my family and my husband's family. I actually have trouble storing them. I'm thinking of copying the idea not just for Christmas, but for a while. The problem is that I store many of these things in silver cloth and am also not the world's most frequent silver polisher. But, as of now, my silver's stored here and there, and I think it might pull my odds and ends together to display them as a collection. Of course, some of the things in this photo are mercury glass, which doesn't oxidize when exposed to air as silver does.

What do you think? Yay or nay?

The Narrow Path...

While my husband was working in California and I was tagging along, I spent some hours wandering down a a public trail that wound around a lagoon. This trail and wildlife preserve were not too far from a busy public thoroughfare. Once in a while, I could see glimpses of the traffic in the distance. Yet, the preserve was peaceful, secluded, and quiet. I met just enough walkers and joggers along the way to feel quite safe, and, yet, I had enough solitude in which to rest and think. I also enjoyed watching the birds, butterflies, bees, and occasional lizard who lived in the brush.

The juxtaposition of the footpath with the highway in the distance reminded me of this challenging verse from Matthew 7:

Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

Why do only a few find the narrow road? I don't think that the Lord wants it that way. After all, Paul tells us in I Timothy 2:1-3 that God wants all men to be saved. In Ezekiel, God tells us that He takes no pleasure in the death of any man. He sent first the prophets and, then, Jesus, to guide us. He promises that if we are in Him, he will guide our steps. (Proverbs 5:3) But, our foolish hearts are prone to wander, as the song says. The road to life leads through the cross, and we struggle with the fact that if we want to come after Jesus, we must first take up our cross daily. (Luke 14). It's a daily choice.

And, so, I'm reminded of how easily I can settle for having the appearance of godliness without its power, and I'm so thankful for grace, which pulls my feet back to the way.

Enjoy!