Look for my historical novel coming soon to a Kindle or a store near you! A Tree Firmly Planted
is the story of how three young woman navigate such issues as faith, slavery, prejudice, new love, marriage, and parenthood, all while living on a battlefield. While it is fiction, it is interwoven with many true incidents that happened in Maury County, Tennessee during the
Civil War. My mother's kin have lived in middle Tennessee since pioneer days, so some of the historical events are part of our family lore.

This is book one of A Tennssee Trilogy.

Enjoy!

Questions that make you say "Hmm..."

I read an interesting discussion on the BlogHer main site today about questions that people ask of acquaintances or even strangers. A blogger noted that women are often asked questions about when they are going to start a family or when they are going to have a next child. She pointed out that many women suffer from infertility or have lost children. In such cases, questions like those can be very painful.

Others commented that these questions go both ways. Women with large families are asked questions such as, "Don't you know what causes that?" or "Are you trying to be like the Duggars?"

My single friends tell me that they don't care for a boatload of questions along the lines of "Have you found that someone yet?" or "Do you see marriage in your future?"

Once, many years ago, I visited a town where I had once lived. From the window of my hostess' home, I saw an acquaintance. She looked as if she were six months along. She carried her hand protectively over her stomach much as most of us do when we are pregnant. I wondered why I hadn't heard the news through mutual friends, but I was thrilled for her nonetheless. So, I ran out to congratulate her.

I'm sure that you've already guessed why I'm telling this story. My friend was not pregnant! She was merely carrying some extra weight. I felt horrible. I felt just as horrible when the tables were turned and someone asked me the same question in the same circumstances!

I'm sure that's not the only time I have opened my mouth and inserted my foot. Don't you think that we all mean well when we ask such questions? I think we all want to connect on a heart level with the people we encounter. Since marriage and family are close to our own hearts, we naturally turn to that subject for conversational material.

Nonetheless, I have learned the hard way that it's all to easy to wound someone with an ill-considered question or an offhand comment. I love this prayer from Psalm 141:3 "Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord; keep watch over the door of my lips."

Jesus draws people in instantly. He knows just what is in a person's heart and what questions will open their minds to God. To me, his encounter with the Samaritan woman at the well is a wonderful example of this. Of course, Jesus is both sinless and has perfect love and wisdom. If I, with my limited insight, wish to ask wise questions, I need to stay prayerful! Otherwise, I tend to open my mouth and insert my foot -- which isn't a pleasant mouthful.

How about you? Have you been wounded by a thoughtless question? When you first meet someone, what do you say or ask in order to get to know them?

Enjoy!
Elizabeth

Selfless focus is one of my goals this year. I realize how complacent I've been in the past year or so. I've let physical ailments become an excuse for indulging self.

This passage from James about selfless wisdom means a lot to me:

Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show by good conduct that his works are done in the meekness of wisdom. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth.This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, twithout partiality and without hypocrisy. Now the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace.

Many years ago, a wise woman I knew taught this acronym: Jesus first, Others second, You last -- which makes for Joy. Over the years, I've noticed that women who truly practice this are the happiest!

Wishing you a fruitful, peaceful, and wise 2012!

Enjoy!

Letters to New Moms -- 2

Dear young mother...

The book of Proverbs contains the lament of a man who did not listen to instruction when he was young and who came to ruin. (Proverbs 5:12-24)

Godly counsel is gold! It's even more so if the advice or correction comes packaged with a dose of comfort and support. Even if it's not delivered in the sweetest style, however, it's still precious, nonetheless. Young wives and mothers especially need the counsel of godly older women.

Choose your advisers wisely. Ask yourself if this person's advice is in line with scripture, if it leads you to greater faith, and if it leads you down the narrow path, rather than the broad one. Consider the outcome of your adviser's faith, as well as his or her success in the area in which they offer advice. Your advisers won't be perfect, but that's ok. You can learn much from someone who humbly walks with the Lord and who humbly admits his or her mistakes. If someone's really blown it in an area, but they have learned from their mistakes, they still have something to offer.

We live in an age when we have an abundance of information at our fingertips. This has its obvious benefits, but it also has a downside. You may find yourself overloaded with information -- even good information -- to the point of paralysis. Remember that, in the end, the Bible is the only writing that serves as an infallible, unshakable foundation for life.

Consider someone's particular advice, but take the responsibility for deciding in prayer whether to implement it or not. Do not let pride or selfishness hinder you from taking needed advice; if you do not implement advice, let it be for other reasons.

Do not compare your life to that of someone you really don't know, especially in the blog-o-sphere. Learn from blogs or books but do not hold the writings of people as an inflexible standard.

Strive for depth of knowledge as well as breadth of knowledge. In our day, it's easy to acquire breadth of knowledge. Most of us receive educations undreamed of by earlier generations. We also can learn a smattering about everything just by searching the net, not to mention coming home from the library with a stack of books. It's important to grasp breadth of knowledge, though. A few precepts, carefully considered and implemented deeply in your life will serve you better than a scatter shot of ideas. In areas where you want to do your best, learn one thing deeply before racing on to the next.

Evaluate your and your husband's priorities in life. Learn what is essential and what is nice, but nonessential. Perhaps, Mother A makes all of her baby food from scratch with ingredients grown on her many acres of land. Perhaps, she writes a blog advocating that all mothers follow this pattern, and she urges her in-real-life friends to do so, too. You can learn from her heart to provide the best she can for her family's table. Yet, her activities in this area may not fit with your family's essential priorities. You do not have to live on a farm or plant a huge garden and orchard to be a godly and effective wife and mother. While processed foods are not the healthiest, it's not the end of the world if you don't make all of your own baby food from scratch. So, take the seed of good and leave the peeling, as they say. That's only one example; in many things, there isn't a right or wrong to consider, but what is best for you and your family.
What is essential is that you bring your child up in the nurture and teaching of the Lord. Strive to grow in faith and character and to build faith and character in your child. As a family, seek the kingdom of God first. Let other things fall into their rightful places in your life.

Seek advice from people who know you and who can give you sound advice based on your situation and needs.

Imitate whatever you see of Christ in others.

Be inspired by women of faith and godly influence.

Neither be too proud to take input or correction, nor so weak-willed as to be swayed off course by every wind of teaching or opinion.

Hold tightly to God's word.

Enjoy!

What's your Happy Home Style?


When it comes to making a happy home, do you love

Neutrals or whites in decorating, with only pops of color?

Or

Colors?

Music playing in the background?

Or

Quiet, plus some natural sounds, such as breezes through open windows or children playing or birds singing?

Lots of happy light?

Or

Peaceful, serene, shaded rooms?

If you love to play music while at home, do you love

something upbeat and modern

or

soft and classical?

Open floor plans?

or

Designated rooms that can be closed off?

Dainty china?

Or

Bold tableware?

Charming pretty nick-knacks?

or

clean, open surfaces?

Vintage?

or

Modern?

There are many possibilities for creating happy home surroundings! Many home choices are neither right nor wrong, but what works best for you and your family.

Enjoy!

Letters to Young Wives and Mothers...

Letter One: Should you carpe diem? Yes, if you think of this wisely."

Young mother, this letter is inspired by a blog post I read entitled, "Don't carpe diem". It was written by a young woman who is mothering young children. If I understand her correctly, she is not encouraged when older mothers smile and give advice along the lines of "seize the day, for your children will grow quickly." She feels that older women expect her to be blissful every moment of every day and, naturally, she knows that she cannot live up to this impossible ideal.

Believe it or not, young mother, I, too, was young once. I once was a mother of young children. Older women said to me and to my peers, "Seize the day. The years when your children are at home will fly more quickly than you know." This did not irritate me or make me feel inadequate. Yet, no matter how much I agreed with the concept, I understood it only in theory. I still had to live my life day by day, to journey through life to the point where this concept became reality.

Now, I understand this experientially. This time is shorter than you can possibly realize. The stakes are high. You are helping to prepare young children for life and for eternity. And, not so very long from now, there will be a day when you do miss your young babies and toddlers and even your teens! Oh, you will be so proud of the adults they have become, and you will enjoy watching them establish homes of their own. You will still love every minute you get to spend with them. You will not spend your empty nest years longing for a time that can never come again, or, at least I pray that you will not.

Even so, when you see a mother with young children, you will be surprised how easily these words will slip from your lips: "Seize the day! The years are short. I enjoyed every minute of being a mother." Some young woman, whose child is throwing a tantrum as you speak, will look at you with puzzled eyes. "You don't mean that you enjoyed minutes like this?"

I am glad to know that some of your peers find words like these to be irritating, for I shall be careful how I speak them. Still, if I could meet my younger self, this is exactly the advice I would speak. "Spend your parenting on the things that matter for life and for eternity and don't fret about the problems so much. So, your child is throwing a tantrum in the store. It's an opportunity to teach and to bond. And, one day, you really will miss even this."

I don't expect you (or my younger self) to walk around like some super-mother who has no trials to face. I remember sleepless nights and long days when every little thing seemed to go wrong. I suffered with my children through colic and skinned knees and the ups and downs of friendships and first broken hearts and learning to obey and learning how to make wise decisions. How else do you think I got these wrinkles and these gray hairs? In the living of these years, however, I learned that sezing the day meant two things: 1) to hold on to joy and 2) to invest in eternity.

Joy does not deny problems, but meets them with faith, gratitude, and love. It is possible to rejoice and sorrow at the same time, as Paul said he did. Our example, Christ, endured the cross for the joy set before Him, as Hebrews informs us. That joy was the joy of knowing that He pleased his Father and that he was pouring out his blood for our salvation. Following Jesus in any arena of life means that we take up our own crosses and follow him daily. (Luke 14). Motherhood is one tool God uses to help us die to selfishness and grow in sacrificial, Christ-like love.

On some occasions, it takes us a moment to tap into joy. The woman who wakes up with morning sickness, only to find that her older toddler is fretful from teething and the cat has thrown up on the carpet and the washer has stopped mid-cycle, may not feel like rejoicing. The trials of life, whether they are small or large, must be reckoned with. We do need to process feelings of fear, inadequacy, grief, and irritation. But, how do we process these feelings? By going to the Lord and casting our burdens on Him. The goal isn't to be blissful every moment of every day, but to trust that the trials of life are working a more Christlike character in us and in our children. Sometimes, our path to joy involves getting the help of others who have endured similar trials. If life hurts, young mother, say so. An older mother should understand.

Joy knows that life lived with respect for the Father is well lived and has meaning. What you do as a mother has great meaning, even if motherhood is made up of many daily, ordinary-seeming moments. Perhaps, this is the most important thing we older women mean when we says, "Enjoy these days." We are older warriors who appreciate the valor of our younger counterparts.

Joy also takes note of the many, many reasons to be grateful. Joy treasures up the many happy moments and the wondrous moments and the awe-filling moments.

To seize the day because the time is short can be viewed in two ways: with a sense of worry and pressure or with a sense of faith and peace. The woman who seizes the day well understands that the time is short, but she does not fret because of this. She follows Jesus' advice: "Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow has enough troubles of its own." Matthew 6:33. Likewise, she heeds his admoition to place her treasure in heaven, where it cannot be destroyed by time.

God has set eternity in the hearts of man, according to Ecclesaistes. Perhaps, that is why we are not satisfied to merely exist, but yearn to spend our time on things that matter. Perhaps, that is why the passing of time brings some pangs. This is true for the mother of children, but it is also true for every person on the planet. Our days may be busy and full, and the time may either seem to fly or to drag. There are moments, however, when eternity breaks in and we ponder whether our priorities are on track or not. No matter what we set our hand to, the time flies by more quickly than we think it will.

In light of eternity, it makes some sense to evaluate how breif our earthly existence is.

"So teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts unto wisdom." Psalm 90:12

"Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men." Colossians 3:23

Seize the day!

January Cleaning!

I don't know about you, but my house is worse for the wear after the holidays. January always feels like the time to me to dig in and get things in order, not that I'm a great example of always having an orderly house.

In our area (Tennessee), we do not have hard winters, but whatever wintry weather we have usually happens between January and March. I can't say for certain that we won't have some snow this year. But, we do not have the unbroken days upon weeks of snow, salted roads and dripping snow boots, as some areas of the U. S. do. Our coldest days are usually followed by mild spells that make one thing of spring.

And, what glorious, but brief springs we have! When those few weeks of mild weather arrive, sandwiched as they are between our winters and our long, long summers, it's a delight to be outside or going places rather than doing heavy cleaning. I'd rather have the intense stuff behind me. So, getting a jump on cleaning now makes sense for our area -- or, at least for me.

Spring cleanings and fall cleanings evolved in the days when houses became very dusty and grimy from winter heating methods. People did not have central air, with its circulating currents, and even the best of house keepers had to fight winter stuffiness. Periodic deep cleanings were essential in the cities, but also evolved along with the rhythms of farm life, as a greater percentage of homes were in rural areas.

Around our part of the South, women also used to keep grass cloth mats to spread upon their regular carpets during rainy spells, such as occur most frequently in the spring and the fall. This was a must in the days when gentlemen tracked the outdoors in on their boots.

In many parts of the U.S., people changed (and still change) curtains and bedding with the seasons. Other than throwing on or taking off an extra layer of bedding, this is not as necessary where I live as it might be in other parts.

Of course, we have many large areas in the U.S. where the weather is unvarying the year round. I spent my early years in Florida, where our roses bloomed best at Christmas. House keeping in semi-tropical areas, arid areas, or Mediterranean type climates is slightly different than in areas with four distinct seasons.

With the advent of central air and other conveniences, many people have dispensed with seasonal cleaning altogether and prefer to work monthly and quarterly and annual chores into their regular cleaning schedule. Others still find its valuable to designate specific periods for deep cleaning.

The need to keep our personal and family shelter clean hasn't changed over time. However, the different circumstances of our lives mean that we can tweak our cleaning habits to suit our and our family's lifestyles. This require thinking through our family's needs, rather than doing what our mothers and grandmothers did simply because they did it. On the other hand, understanding how they cleaned and why can help us adapt their wisdom about keeping a clean and orderly home to our practices today.

What about you? In what type of climate do you live? How do you handle non-routine cleaning chores? Do you set aside periods of deep cleaning? Or, do you work extra tasks into a weekly routine? What accommodations do you make in your house cleaning for the types of weather you normally have?

Enjoy!

Happy New Year!!
Here's to another trip around the sun...
Love, Joy, and Peace
Blessings and Hope
Walking with Christ
Fresh start, fresh life, fresh home
Goals and Progress
Resting and Refreshing
Work and Stillness
Goodness Abounding
Steps in the Journey
On our Way Home
God's mercies are new every morning!

Have you seen these 86 fresh Christmas decorating ideas from Southern Living Magazine? Of course, as is always the case with Southern Living, the accompanying photos are lovely.

In the photo above is an idea that I'm thinking about trying. I have some random silver pieces from my family and my husband's family. I actually have trouble storing them. I'm thinking of copying the idea not just for Christmas, but for a while. The problem is that I store many of these things in silver cloth and am also not the world's most frequent silver polisher. But, as of now, my silver's stored here and there, and I think it might pull my odds and ends together to display them as a collection. Of course, some of the things in this photo are mercury glass, which doesn't oxidize when exposed to air as silver does.

What do you think? Yay or nay?

The Narrow Path...

While my husband was working in California and I was tagging along, I spent some hours wandering down a a public trail that wound around a lagoon. This trail and wildlife preserve were not too far from a busy public thoroughfare. Once in a while, I could see glimpses of the traffic in the distance. Yet, the preserve was peaceful, secluded, and quiet. I met just enough walkers and joggers along the way to feel quite safe, and, yet, I had enough solitude in which to rest and think. I also enjoyed watching the birds, butterflies, bees, and occasional lizard who lived in the brush.

The juxtaposition of the footpath with the highway in the distance reminded me of this challenging verse from Matthew 7:

Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

Why do only a few find the narrow road? I don't think that the Lord wants it that way. After all, Paul tells us in I Timothy 2:1-3 that God wants all men to be saved. In Ezekiel, God tells us that He takes no pleasure in the death of any man. He sent first the prophets and, then, Jesus, to guide us. He promises that if we are in Him, he will guide our steps. (Proverbs 5:3) But, our foolish hearts are prone to wander, as the song says. The road to life leads through the cross, and we struggle with the fact that if we want to come after Jesus, we must first take up our cross daily. (Luke 14). It's a daily choice.

And, so, I'm reminded of how easily I can settle for having the appearance of godliness without its power, and I'm so thankful for grace, which pulls my feet back to the way.

Enjoy!

Likewise, the brand of sunscreen my dermatologist recommends for me.

What is your sun risk Factor?

Do you know your sun exposure risk factor, based on your skin type? The American Academy of Dermatology divides skin tones into six types. Each skin type is beautiful, but each carries with it its own particular risk factor for damage/cancer due to sun exposure.

The skin types are as follows:

Type I – Extremely High Risk

People with skin type I do not tan whatsoever. They burn easily. Their skin is extremely sensitive to the sun. They have very fair white skin, and usually have light (blond or red) hair and light eyes, as well.

Skin Type II – Very High Risk

People with skin type II skin burn easily, but they can, with great difficulty, achieve a very light tan after repeated sun exposure. Their skin is highly sensitive to the sun. Like Type I, they have fair skin and eyes and hair that are on the lighter, rather than darker, side.

Skin Type III – High Risk

People with skin type III sometimes burn, but normally tan to a light, all-over brown when in the sun. Their skin is sensitive to the sun. They may have white to olive skin tones. This group is the largest skin risk factor group in the U. S.

Did you know that there is no safe way to tan?

Skin Type IV – Moderate Risk

People with skin type IV will quickly tan to a moderate brown. They may sunburn, but minimally. They may have olive to light brown skin.

Skin Type V – Low Risk

People with skin type V will find that they seldom get a sunburn and that they tan easily and deeply in the sun. They may have light to fairly dark brown skin.

Skin Type VI – Minimal Risk

People with skin type VI have deep skin tones. In the sun, they hardly ever burn, if ever. People in this category generally have dark black or very dark brown skin.

Types IV, V, and especially VI (lucky you!) generally show aging of the skin later than Types I, II, and III. There are skin cancers in these lower risk groups, but the frequency of occurrence is lower than for the higher risk groups. Even though your risk of skin damage and skin cancer is lower, it is still an important risk, nonetheless. The American Academy of Dermatologist recommends that everyone, even those with skin that seems impervious to the sun, wear a sunscreen with a SPF of 30. We all need to protect our skins, for skin is the largest organ in our bodies and is essential to our health and well-being.

I think I'm risk factor Type II. I think my husband is Type III, maybe IV, and my children are Type I and Type II. Which type are you? How about your spouse? Children? If you'd like to know more, ask your physician.

Enjoy!

Children, Wear your sunscreen...Did you hear me?

Every one of my children's four grandparents have had at least one incidence of skin cancer. Now, I have a few pre-cancers, as well as some benign, but not-so-fun sun damage on my skin. It pays to wear your sun block, I tell my children.

According to Women's Health Magazine, "UV radiation alters the actual DNA of your skin cells, causing lines, wrinkles, discoloration, and even cancer."

Of course, the sun is a God-given source of physical life and happiness for our planet. Unless we shun the day and only come out at night, we can hardly avoid the sun, nor would we want to! However, we can take precautions to keep the sun from damaging our skins.

In order to take wise precautions, we need to be aware of AMA, FDA, and dermatologist guidelines. Unless we are aware of current recommendations, we are likely to make some sunblock mistakes. For example, we might use too little (It takes a full ounce of sunscreen to protect a person wearing a swimsuit for the allotted time on the sunscreen bottle. That means an eight ounce bottle of sunscreen contains only approximately 8 applications of sunscreen for someone who is swimming or at the beach.) Likewise, we may fail to buy a broad spectrum sunscreen, which blocks both UVA and UVB radiation. (Sun blocks will soon be required to block both, but do not currently have to. Look for a sun block that does cover both types of radiation.) Or, we might put too much hope in a jar. A sunscreen cannot block all the sun's rays, and it is possible to get a burn or damage your skin by lingering too long in the sun, even while wearing sun block.

Here's an article by the University of San Francisco California School of Medicine which gives you all the information you need to purchase an effective sun block and to use it correctly.

Note: Some think that using sun block not only prevents future sun damage to the skin, but it may reverse sun damage you have already received, as well. Perhaps, this is because skin that is protected from immediate sun damage can turn its resources to healing past damage.

Enjoy!

A heart from God...

This morning, my husband and I walked down to the beach. As we enjoyed the gorgeous surroundings, we also shared with each other things that we have been learning from God recently.

Just as we got to the water's edge, I glanced down and saw a heart shaped rock that the ocean had thrown back up onto the beach. I know that could have been purely coincidence. In the moment, however, it seemed like a gift from God, and I like to think that is what it was. Just a little further, I found another similarly shaped rock.

An acquaintance of ours shared that when he passes spiritual milestones or comes to a decision of repentance and growth in some area, he will write the date on a rock and keep it as a remembrance. I think I shall keep these rocks to commemorate this lovely time, as well as to remind me of some spiritual goals that I have.

My husband teased me by saying, "You don't want a heart of stone, do you?" That reminded me of the wonderful promises in the book of Ezekiel concerning our hearts. God promises to remove our hearts of stone and give us hearts of flesh, to give us undivided hearts, to give us a new spirit in our hearts, and to move us to keep his ways. I love God's promises and the fact that He is always faithful to his promises.

I also love spending time with my husband. Next month, we will celebrate our 31st anniversary! It's hard to believe how fast the years have flown. I love that my husband still seeks God with all of his heart, which is a quality which drew me to him in the first place. I also love that we can share with each other the things that the Lord is putting on our hearts.

Did you grow up on Dr. Seuss, as I did? As a child, I loved it when my parents read his books to me, and I was especially delighted when my father used food coloring to concoct
for me "a dish if " Green Eggs and Ham".

Of course, I shared the books with my children when they were young. Recently, my son told me that, when he visited San Diego, he heard that Dr. Seuss had spent some time in Southern California and that many of his drawings were inspired by the local vegetation. Now, I am visiting Southern California, and I can see a resemblance between some of Dr. Seuss' characters and the many beautiful trees and plants around here.

This made me curious, so being the Internet nerd that I am, I turned to Wikipedia's article about Theodor Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss). While the biography does note that Dr. Seuss lived in LaJolla for several years, it seems to indicate that his style was influenced more by his original boyhood home and surroundings in the mid west. Certainly, his career was well established by the time he moved to California, though some of his famous books were written in LaJolla.

What do you think? Have you lived in California or visited here? Do you think the vegetation could have been inspiration for his drawing style? Have you ever heard this? An inquiring mind wants to know....

enjoy!

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It pays to be a classic...

Do you have classic or traditional tastes? If so, this may help you sail through tough economic times. How, you say?

People with classic or traditional tastes often decorate their homes by "shopping" in grandma's attic. Re-purposing some timeless antiques is a low-cost way to create a timeless and inviting look in a home.

Likewise, women with classic or traditional tastes (along with the funky, but vintage-style woman) have a knack for adding heirloom items to their wardrobe. Jewelry, evening bags, and scarves add spice to more modern pieces of clothing.

Since classic and traditional clothing stays in style longer and wears well due to good construction, women who purchase classics as their basic wardrobe pieces can stretch their wardrobes longer without buying much, if anything, new.

Enjoy!

i30 days of smart money choices

We, like many families' would rather not pay $100 a month for cable TV. We use a Roku system. Little did we know that we are part of a significant trend. How about you? Have you investigated ways to save on your entertainment budget, especially with regard to TV?

Enjoy!

30 Days of Smart Money Choices: The Casual Wardrobe

Do you have a closet full of clothes but nothing to wear? One reason might be that you have allocated too much of your wardrobe budget for items that you seldom wear, while you have spent too little on the things you actually wear day to day. Since our society is becoming progressively more casual, chances are a woman who has this problem with her closet may have neglected to buy enough well-made, long-lasting, and flattering casual garments.

The term "casual" covers a lot of ground. Items in the casual part of your wardrobe might include sports and outdoor clothing, clothes to run errands in, clothes you might wear at home, clothes you might wear when running a home business or managing your household, to items you might wear for casual social events. Casual items might include skirts, dresses, pants, tops, shoes, purses, etc.

The one thing casual shouldn't mean is shoddily made. Since we wear our casual clothing more often, it's wise to search for the best quality for the price. That doesn't mean our casual wear must necessarily expensive, but it should be durable, well-fitting, comfortable, and pleasingly presentable.

Casual clothing can express any fashion personality from boho to chic. Obviously, women who have sporty fashion sensibilities will lean toward casual items. (In fact, they may have too many casual items and not enough dressier ones.) Women who like preppy styles and women who have natural tastes will also adore casual items. Women who dress in classic style may also have a special flair for wearing casual clothing, though they will also have dressier items in their closets.

One way to wear casual clothing is to choose a number of basic pieces in neutral colors. These can be dressed up or down through your choice of shoes and accessories. Many women turn their favorite one or two neutrals into sort of an "everyday uniform", which they can pull together quickly and easily.

Enjoy!

Thirty Days of Smart Money Choices:

A man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions. Luke 12:15

The Greatest Generation, as they are called, generally followed a strict corporate career structure. Beginning with their baby boomer children, each succeeding generation has become more flexible in job outlook. Millenials, for example, are often entrepreneurial in spirit and often start small businesses that are centered on jobs or skills they enjoy. Internet technology makes it possible to market such businesses. Many are choosing job and life satisfaction over prestige and paycheck.

Whatever generation someone belongs to, today's business culture makes it more likely that an individual will have at least two types of work during their lifetime. For example, the baby boomer who is downsized out of a job or who has retired may start a new venture during midlife and later -- provided that they are physically healthy enough to do so. Likewise, a woman may choose for her main career to be that of managing her home and family, yet she may also take on outside work in different seasons of life. The young entrepreneur who launches a small business may sell a successful one and move on to something else or, conversely, may not succeed and end up in a more traditional work role.

If you are at a career crossroads in life, you may be stuck as to what you want to do next. Here are a couple of ideas:

As baby boomers and Gen X-ers age, more health care resources are needed. If you do not wish to go back to school to become a doctor or a nurse, there are other opportunities in the field of medicine that you might consider. For example, you might become a paid health care advocate, who helps patients manage their own health care. Or, you might become a sitter for someone who is home bound. Health care provides volunteer opportunities, too.

If health care is not your thing, you might consider becoming a docent. If your town has a museum or a historical attraction, for example, you may find work giving tours. Similarly, libraries often need assistance.

In some places, any college degree will qualify you to become a substitute teacher. If you love children and are looking for "a career after a career", consider substituting.

If you are a manager of your home, consider that much of this world's good has been traditionally done by women at home whose children are grown. You might choose to forgo getting a job simply because your children are out of the house and people expect you to do something, anything. You are still needed in our home. Likewise, you are needed to fill roles that have traditionally been done by women of mid-life and beyond. You might, for example, unofficially mentor young wives and moms in your area, do volunteer and church work, get involved in service to your neighborhood or city, help out the elderly in your neighborhood, etc. The possibilities are endless.

In our era, we are not as limited in our choice of vocation or avocation as we once were. Before you settle for grinding a way at a job you no longer enjoy, investigate what other possibilities you can explore. Remember, though, that it is best not to quit your current job until you know for certain that you do have replacement income. Also remember that it is not always possible to do exactly what we want to do. Sometimes, we have to work at something we don't particularly enjoy in order to provide for our families, and, sometimes, we do have to stick with a career path that no longer suits us. A job that pays the bills is a blessing in this economy, whether it's a dream job or not.

Enjoy!
Elizabeth

Art of Putting pen to paper

I've been thinking a lot about letter writing today. I set out to write a lovely letter to my lovely daughter, and I searched the Internet looking for lovely inspiration. Now that I type that, I see some irony in turning to the technology -- wonderful as it is -- for help in an art that has been largely diminished by that very technology. Yet, I did find some wonderful spark for creativity.

First, I found that there are many blogs devoted entirely to the art of letter writing. Here was one of the first that I came across: 365 Days of Letters.
Another inspiring site devoted to letter writing is this one: A Year of Letters. These two blogs connect to a number of blogs about writing letters, which I hope to explore in the coming days.

I also found research that says, believe it or not, that penmanship is good for your health and also essential to a child's development. After reading several articles on the subject, I became convinced that putting pen to paper can

1) help those of us who are on the back end of the baby boom to keep our minds sharp as we age.
2) help any of us remember, as we apparently remember something better if we write it down than if we don't.
3) help children develop the brain in an essential way that does not occur with texting or typing.
4) help children learn fine motor detail.
5) inspire confidence in us.
6) help us communicate better with people who live in areas that are not as technologically advanced as our society is -- an essential if you have a mission mindset or a philanthropic interest in a developing country.
7) Help us truly communicate feelings in a way that can not be communicated through email or texts.

Along with all the good news that attention is being paid to handwriting, I also found this beautiful ode to the passing art of writing letters. The author describes receiving beautiful letters from her mother-in-law, muses about the importance of letters, and wonders if the next generation will even write them.

I suppose that it's natural I should think about the art of writing letters, as I have found many beautiful family letters among stuff that I cleared out from a house that my father sold. I found letters that my father had written to his family when he was stationed abroad during World War II and the outcome of the war had not yet been decided. I found the letters that my parents exchanged when they were engaged, and my father moved ahead of my mother to the town where they would live once they were married.

I also kept the letters that my husband wrote to me during our courtship and engagement, along with every letter or card he has written to me during our thirty years of marriage. I have no plan to discontinue the practice of keeping writings from my beloved Doc Brilliant.

My friends and I used to delight in receiving sweet letters from our beaux and in keeping those letters in some special spot in our rooms to re-savor as we wished. What do girls do now that so much of their communication with their suitors is done through texts?

On the one hand, I think that letter writing continues in the tradition of buying cards and writing notes on them. We live in an age when stores sell exquisite stationery, and I'm sure I'm not the only person who buys such. On the other hand, I can't keep up with the volume of email and texts I receive, while a hand-written letter waiting for me in the mailbox is a rare treat nowadays.

Let you think I'm anti-electronic communication, let me assure you that I am not. I am happy that I can instantly converse with even far away friends and family in texts and emails and via Skype and all other manner of helpful technology. I think about mothers left in Europe, waiting for word of their pioneer children to cross perilous territory on the North American continent and to pass on slow ships across the Atlantic, and feel privileged to live in a time when I can so easily keep up with how my adult children are doing.

Still, I'd hate to see snail-mail letter writing fade away completely. What do you think? Is letter writing a dying art? Or, is it thriving? Do you think the revival of journal writing in recent years is a way that we are trying to capture something that we used to gain from writing letters? Do you like to put pen to paper, or would you rather text? Is there a way to have the best of both worlds -- electronic communiques and hand-written missives?

I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Enjoy!

Day 17 (after a break!)

Smart Money Choices!

Consider the relative importance of stuff: A friend of mine told me this weekend that she had befriended a widow in her neighborhood. The widow went on a trip to Europe and was killed in an accident there. My friend went down to the house, where they were holding an estate sale, and she noticed -- with a pang -- that her friend had left behind lots and lots of stuff which she will now never be able to use.

I'm sure that this widow left behind a legacy of other things -- such as love for her family or faith or perhaps even well managed funds. But, if we are not careful, our legacy can be a lot of stuff that will burden our families when it comes time to clean out our dwelling places. In fact, if we Americans are not careful, we can spend the first part of our adult years accumulating things and the last part trying to get rid of things. I've been thinking about this a lot as I've been dealing with my own accumulation of things. Some of these are things we bought; others are things we inherited. Some do have value. A good many things, however, don't have any real value.

That's not to say that owning things is wrong. But, having too much stuff that you don't enjoy and realistically can't ever use becomes a negative drain. Treasure in heaven, on the other hand, is always positive!

Improve your skills and interests:

Keeping current with skills and interests can put money in your bank. Here are some reasons why: 1) In today's world, it is likely that we will change jobs at some point in our life. The person who is interested in life and who has developed his or her talents is better able to weather changes in work life. 2) Many of us will arrive at the retirement years with the health, time, and energy to begin a new vocation or avocation. We may also need to supplement our retirement income. Again, the person who has stayed invested in learning will be able to take advantage of later life opportunities. (For those who do not enter retirement with physical strength, learning can provide enjoyable stimulation, if nothing else.)
3) Those of us who have chosen to make home our career may need to take a temporary or even permanent job if circumstances change. Again, if you have continued to learn and to develop your skills, you can move into a new line of work if necessary. 4) We may have chosen a field that we find no longer satisfies us. If we have pursued learning a few other interests, we may be able to change to a more enjoyable job. Sometimes, however, we may have to be grateful for the job and the paycheck that we do have, even if it isn't our dream work. In that case, an avocation can add to our enjoyment of life. 5) The woman at home may organize charity events or otherwise be active in church and/or volunteer work. Continuing to learn helps us with this.

How does a busy woman continue to learn? Many have little time left over to study. In that case, we can do several things to develop our talents:

1) Devote just one hour a week or 15 minutes a day to study or practice.
2) Use time with friends to take an interest in their lives. Ask questions and learn about their activities.
3) Jot down things you want to remember on note cards or on your phone or I-pad and glance at them throughout the day.
4) If you are homeschooling, learn on a deeper level the things that you are teaching your children at their level. For example, if you are interested in science, you can teach your fifth grader things a fifth grader can understand while reading a graduate school level book yourself.
5) Keep a collection of books or files about a few subjects that interest you. It's probably better to study a few things deeply than to learn a little about this and that.
6) Keep up with current affairs, particularly in areas that interest you.
7) Take family outings to museums and other places of learning.

Enjoy!
Elizabeth